Its been a while since I wrote in this blog. When I did this eight days ago I never thought I was about to be fired from my ministry position. It has been an interesting week and I have had a lot of ministry reflections but no time to write them. One of the things I really need to work on is writing my thoughts more often, it will be a critical piece for me. I have doubted and questioned my ministry and I have thought a lot about what is next and where to go with things. I see my call and know God has something huge in store for me. I am hurting and need a break.
I am auditing a Fuller course on Henri Nouwen. I did not think I was going to be able to do the reading, but now that I am out of work I can. I am looking forward to the course and the retreat that will start it off. I was reading his book, The Living Reminder which is short and powerful. It is something that I think every minister needs to read. One of the things that he talks about is the ministry of absence. We focus so much on presence and the expectation of ministers in terms of presence is high. I never even thought that absence is a ministry or a reality or even a good or acceptable idea. Now I am thinking hard about what the ministry of absence looks like and means especially in a postmodern culture and as churches get older and are controlled by a boomer generation with such high expectations. “Therefore , ministers do not fulfill their whole task when they only witness to God’s presence and do not tolerate the experience of his absence.” pg 44. I do not think that God is ever absent, but I do think that it can feel like God is absent, and surely in all of our relationships with God and others we experience absence. Should we embrace a ministry of absence? What does that look like in today’s church?